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The Choleric Woman.

Cholerics are leaders, go-getters, people who hate sluggishness, go-slow and distractions.
They set goals and achieve them. They are high flyers, result-oriented and of course hard drivers. They have zero tolerance for excuses and enjoy using others to achieve their goals. Women like that are everywhere and here of course.

Who do they attract? Who marries them? The gentle phlegmatic of course! Wherever you see a "hot" woman, she must have a "cold" husband or the house will be on fire!!!
If you are wandering why "hot" people run away from you and the "cold" are attracted to you then you could be the hot choleric who keep attracting the cold phlegmatics!
Cholerics hate to be challenged or they give "fire for fire!" Hence falling in love with a man who keeps quiet, smiles lovingly at them and watch them "burn!".



But no one is perfect. Soon, the choleric wifey gets irritated at the super slow, laid back, procrastinating, fearful, doubting husband who won't take charge where necessary, is not proactive, and taking initiatives takes lots of prayer and fasting!
Phlegmatic hubby eventually gets bitter at his insensitive, sarcastic, rude, unsympathetic, domineering, bossy, proud wifey and withdraws into his shell. Phlegmatics know how to punish the choleric with their silence and chief of all, stubbornness!!

Just when you need him most to do something for you, he keeps mute and stubbornly, resolutely refuses to.
Smiles. No one is perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses.

Choleric wives will of course have a great, loving, peaceful marriage if they will take time to understand their phlegmatic husbands and learn how to manage them (kindly read WHY YOU ACT THE WAY YOU DO and OPPOSITES ATTRACT by Tim Lahaye in this regard). 

If you can understand him, look past his weaknesses and relate with him with full understanding, honestly, you will enjoy heaven on earth in your marriage.

 1.  Acknowledge that you need help from God to have a great marriage. Seek His help: his wisdom, direction and grace daily and you will be amazed at how transformed you are to meet the needs of your husband and lovingly accommodate him.

 2.  Take time to study your weaknesses  and consciously work on them.

 3.  Learn to be patient with your husband, listen to him and verbally appreciate his input in your life.

 4. Admire, praise and compliment him daily. Phlegmatics easily battle low self esteem and your domineering nature threatens him. Your success at times challenges his manhood especially if he is not as successful as you are. He may not talk about it or he may use dry humor to "attack" you. If you will affirm his manhood, appreciate, honor and deeply show him respect even when you think he doesn't deserve it, he will love you with his very life and give you his 100% support in your life's endeavours, dreams, aspiration and vision.

 5. Learn to initiate sex and let him know you enjoy him. Phlegmatics can be laid back even in the bedroom. Introvert husbands enjoy being chased by their extrovert wives.

 6.  Lovingly correct him when he goes wrong pray for God to touch his heart when he is proving stubborn and defensive.

 7.  Avoid being sarcastic.
 8.  Don't throw your success and achievements in his face.
 9.  In your marriage, learn to lead from behind not from the front.
10. Be humble. Be humble. Be humble.

I pray the good Lord will help us all to be the best He wants us to be and give us the wisdom to run out home successfully in Jesus' name!!

Thank you all for having me. I am grateful!

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