Thursday, September 22, 2022


I was in one relationship some years back before I met my wife, she was an amazing lady. 

Wanted to step things up a little bit so I invited her over to meet my family. After all the familiar was done and she wanted to leave, I dipped my hand in my wallet and gave her transport money in front of my mom. 

I saw nothing wrong in that, it was innocent, not until after I came back from seeing her off did my mom give me the longest lecture of my life for giving her money in her presence. 

1) It is wrong to give a woman money in the presence of her family, or the presence of people generally. Very wrong. 
Many men do this a lot, just like me many years ago. Some will even escort her to the bus stop, put her on a bus, pay the conductor and stand there to collect change. What kind of character is that?
Some of you will walk her to the road and remove money from your pocket and give her when the bus comes, in the presence of all the passengers on the bus, you will even be delaying the driver in the name of removing money, and aunty will have no choice but to collect, otherwise, she will walk back home. It's very wrong Sir. 

You give a woman money before leaving the house before you start walking her to the road, or the cab. You don't even give her the money by hand, you slip it into her bag or her purse and tell her you to put something in there for transport fare. That is how it's done. Most of you will go and start dragging for change with the conductor at the bus stop, poor girl will be sitting on the bus like a less privileged, waiting for you to collect your change and shout bye-bye.

2) Most men don't call after a lady leaves. She will come to see you, leave, get home, and start calling you to announce that she has arrived home safely. That is very wrong. 
When a lady leaves your company, calling her even while she's still on her way home is such a caring thing to do, just to check up to see if she's okay on the bus, and how close she is to home. If you cannot call shortly after she leaves, make sure you time yourself to call her before she calls you to announce her arrival. It a normal etiquette, most of you will not call until next week. So bad. 

3) I'm sure most of you don't know when you take a lady out to dinner you are supposed to pull her a chair and wait to make sure she's comfortable before taking your seat. No, you don't know, you just rush to sit down like an elephant.

4) You don't call a woman sweetie, darling, sugar, butter, honey, etc. when there is no clearly defined purpose between you too. It's very wrong, no one is your sweetheart until she has accepted to become one, learn to be a gentleman.

5) Giving you her number does not give you the right to just call her at any hour of the day, people are busy. Send a text first to introduce yourself and ask for the best time to call her. Giving you a good time to call is how you know she fancies you too, that is how many of you just call out of the blues and chop premium embarrassment. 

6) When you go visiting her family, don't go empty-handed, at least go with a bottle of wine or some packs of juice. I don't know how most of you cope with showing up with nothing in hand, I don't know. Ask her what her siblings might like and get it on your way, a regular box of pizza is not that much of a bad idea. 

I hope you can start making little adjustments where necessary, these tips are not Ten Commandments, do your best to be disciplined in the areas where you can. 

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