Monday, January 24, 2022

11 Ways To Know If You Are A Bad Parent To Your Children.

Bad parenting is 80% of the reasons your child turned out the way he or she is today.

What I'm going to tell you today, is don't ever lose it because it's information that's going to help you mold or remold your child for his or her great future.

If possible with you, you should;

Print it out and place it on a wall where you will see it on a daily basis.
 
Photo credit: istock

Secondly, in your bag where you will carry it up with you everywhere, you go in order for you not to forget it.

Thirdly in your kitchen, you get to see it every time you are cooking or anytime you visit the kitchen if you are a Dad.

If you are expecting the school system to train your child excellently then you have failed as a parent because morals are not thought in school.

Your child spends more time at home than in school except if you decide to turn him into a border and even those resident in school, moral education is very important to them.

You are your child's first teacher so get ready him or her whatever they deserve from you as a parent.

I always tell anyone who cares to listen that I will not use a cane on my child but that doesn't mean he will become a spoilt brat for any reason.

Remember the third law of motion; "to every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction." That's the law.

Your child's behaviors today or in the future are a reaction to the action you gave earlier.

This article was culled from a Facebook post made a few years ago, you may have been wondering why I kept it right? That's because I know I will be a parent someday and I will need to spoil the rod and save my child.

So here are the 11 ways to know if you are a bad parent.

1) If your child intentionally disturbs you; it is because you are not physically affectionate enough to make that child happy. Your child shouldn't grow to know about love from the neighborhood, affection should start from you as the parent.

2) If your child is telling lies; it means you are overreacting to the mistakes in the past and because of the fear of not being beaten up by you, he or she chooses to tell lies and be saved from your ravaging anger without minding the danger involved.

3) If your child has poor self-esteem; it is because you advise more than you encourage them. Nobody was born perfect, not even you. Encourage them to be responsible, tell your child that it's normal to make mistakes but it's not normal when it becomes a lifestyle.

4) If your child doesn't stand up for themselves; it is because from a young age you have always disciplined them in public. The best place to advise and discipline your child is in the private corner of your room and not in public. As a matter of fact, you should stand with your child in public to protect his dignity, self-esteem, and confidence as well but seriously discipline him or her in private with caution that what he or she did in public was bad and is not tolerated by you or anyone else.

You shouldn't discipline them even in front of siblings, friends, or cousins so they will not use it against them later in the day for any reason.

5) If you buy anything for your children and they still take things that don't belong to them; it is because you don't let them choose or make their choice. The fact that you are providing for your child doesn't mean that child doesn't have the right to make their own choice. Just like you have the desire, so also your child has the desire, the difference is that you can advise him or her on the best way to make use of his desire. One of the rights of your child is the right to choose.

6) If your child is a coward; it is because you help them too quickly on everything. Don't remove every obstacle on their part but let them learn to believe and do things on their own without wholly waiting for someone to help them. Self-confidence is very important.

7) If your child is always jealous; the reason might be because you compare them with others consistently and this could make a child believe that the person you are comparing him with is better than him, this is not good parenting.

8) If your child gets angry quickly; the reason might be you haven't praised them enough for the positive and good things done in the past. They only get attention by misbehaving or reacting negatively around you.

9) If your child doesn't respect other people's feelings; the reason is simply that you always order them not to give importance to their own feelings.

10) If your child is being secretive with everything even to you his parent. The reason is you blow things very big. One reason I stopped telling my mom things especially household tasks is because of the constant reminder and I don't like it, I want to be confident enough to remember to do things on my own without someone reminding me to do it although this is not a secret.

11) If your child behaves rudely to you or other people in the neighborhood, it is learned from parents or others living with them. The mental and emotional environment you create for your child has a lot to do with that child's behavior in the future. The fact that you were brought up or trained in a harsh and rude way doesn't mean you should bring your child up the same way you know is not pleasing to you because you weren't enjoying it that time.

I know you might not get a manual for parenting but you should know that for every action you take on your child today, there is an equal and opposite reaction for it, that's the third law of motion.

If you decide to continue the old way, that's the reason your child will be a pretender or a rebel to society in the future. You get to choose the one you want.

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