The Best Thing To Do When You Discover The Person You Love Doesn't Love You..

As a counselor, one relationship concern often brought to me is a situation where someone is in love with a partner who isn't in love with them. A situation like:

"I love him so much, but he doesn't love me"

or:

"I love her, but she doesn't love me"

What should I do?

Honestly speaking, there is nothing to do. Absolutely nothing!

If they don't love you, that's a clear message to you. Please accept it in good faith and be grateful to God that you are even aware that they don't love. In some cases, some persons pretend, fake it, and deceive the other partner, making them believe that they love them.

                      

 

If you are in a love relationship where you sense or know that you are not loved, or someone is preferred over you by your partner, what you need to do is END the relationship and MOVE ON.

This is why:

A healthy relationship is one where both lovers are in love with each other. Love should be mutually beneficial and reciprocal; it must flow from both lovers, otherwise, it will be an unhealthy experience.

No matter who they might be, no one lover can make a relationship work all alone. Of course, lovers are trying their best to do what two lovers should be doing in a relationship. Sadly, it can't work and has never worked. It takes two to tangle.

Over the years, many friends and fans have celebrated my marriage and given me all the credit for making our marriage work. Of course, I have appreciated their praises and commendations. Who wouldn't like it? However, I am also very honest in telling them that I might be a marriage and relationship coach, a woman with marital knowledge depths, but our marriage is not working because of me alone; it's succeeding because my wife and I are committed to its success. Therefore, the credit goes to her as well. She is also the reason why our marriage is working.

Dear singles, don't force a relationship that isn't working. Don't force yourself on a partner who doesn't love. When you are not loved in a relationship, the best thing to do is to end it. Of course, I know you might have invested your time, money, or other resources and it didn't work. I know you rejected many other opportunities. I know you even bragged about your partner to your family, and friends, and on social media. I know this may be your first love. I know this person is the only person you have ever truly loved.

But the ugly reality staring you in the face is that they don't love you; they're in love with someone else. You're not their love.

Fine, you may be possessing all that a great lover possesses. You are beautiful, cute, handsome, rich, educated, accomplished, sexy, well-behaved, supportive, caring and highly spiritual. But the matter here is not what you possess or don't possess. The matter here is:

They don't love you!

Therefore:

How many more tears do you want to shed before you make a decision?

How many more sleepless nights do you want to have?

How many more heartaches do you want to experience?

How many more embarrassments do you want to get?

How many more disappointments do you want to go through?

How many more sufferings do you want to subject yourself to before you will understand that they love you, and want you?

Peace of mind is elusive where there's self-hatred. Self-hatred is when you keep hanging onto a relationship not working or not meant to be. You hate yourself for doing that.

Love is beautiful, but you shouldn't be the only one loving. The other partner should love you in return. That's how it should be. You deserve to be loved also. 

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